An excellent place to start is to reflect on how much you trust yourself.
Think about it for a moment. On a trust scale of one to ten, where are you? One is no trust, and 10 is complete trust.
First, you must trust yourself to build and maintain healthy trust in your close relationships.
Learning the Enneagram can help you increase trust in your relationship.
Read MoreGod is a big word. You and I have different images of God. When I refer to God, I am talking about an energy/force within and around you that connects everything, both animate and inanimate.
It is the higher power within us that speaks to us through our bodies (sensations), hearts (emotions) and heads (quiet mind).
God is a loving force that seeks to bring out the best in each of us and sustain a world where all life has a chance to thrive.
There is the spark of God in each of us. It is not something we earn. It is a gift given to us to be used wisely and with compassion.
The good news is that God is within all of us.
Read MoreWhat does it mean for you? There are many different ways to be a spiritual person.
You can be a spiritual person in and outside of religion. Spirituality is about recognizing and experiencing the life force that connects you with everything animate and inanimate. It connects you with a greater power that humans have given many names.
If you are part of a faith community, you might refer to this power as God, Allah, Goddess, Mohammad, Jesus, Budah and many more.
The major religions of the world have much to teach us about spirituality. No religion is better than another; they are just different.
They all came into being to help people live joyful, meaningful and purposeful lives. People who inspired the great religions of the world saw a need to build more caring and just communities.
What does it mean for you to be a spiritual person?
Religion has done great things, such as ending slavery, providing education for all, standing up for civil rights, bringing down the iron curtain and more.
Also, terrible things happen in the name of religion, such as the crusade, antisemitism, promotion of slavery, division, extremist ideology, Islamaphobia and Christian nationalism.
If you are part of a faith tradition, find a person who can help you to learn your tradition, letting go of what no longer serves you and practising traditions that give you life. Each religion has a different lens to experience spirituality.
In the Abrahamic faiths (Judaism, Islam and Christianity), a good guide would be to follow the great commandment to love God with all your heart, be kind to yourself and love your neighbour as yourself.
As much of the world has become more secular, spirituality has taken on a life beyond the world's religions. I am going to focus on finding spirituality outside of organized religion.
The irony is that many practices used in the secular world have origins in religion.
How would you describe your understanding of what it means to be a spiritual person to a friend?
Read MoreSome might say Enneagram Type Eight, the Challenger, is the hardest to love. At their average levels, the Challenger can be forceful and aggressive. They assert control over themselves and others. They will push even harder whenever they feel someone is trying to hold them back. Eights can be intimidating because they say whatever is on their mind. They don't care what other people think of them.
Eights feel vulnerable. Most people don't realize they are big-hearted people. Unfortunately, as a way to survive, they close their hearts down because they believe it is unsafe to be weak and vulnerable.
Average eights will hide their true feelings and expect people to try and control them. This wound sets up an in-balance of power, making it difficult for the couple to communicate and resolve conflict. The eight is always ready for battle, increasing the potential for severe conflict or the silencing of the non-eight partner.
Read MoreGoing through a divorce may have been one of the most challenging times in your life. Now that you are through the divorce, you can move ahead. You now have a fantastic opportunity to do a life reset. Now is a time to heal and discern what is most vital for you to live your life. It is time to claim your new life after divorce.
Read MoreHow to connect with God. It takes time and intention to open yourself to the Spirit.
God is a big word; there is no one definition of God. God is a powerful source of wisdom beyond anything we can understand. God is the living energy/spirit that gives life to everything and connects you with everything.
God is much bigger than all the great religions of the world. Together, all of them help us to name the mystery of God. God has names such as Father, Friend, Oneness, Allah, YHWH, Jehovah, Elohim, Adonai, Hu, and El Shaddai. God is not something you can put in a box.
In Christianity, we even say that Jesus was God. There is nothing wrong with imagining God as a person as long as we do not limit our understanding. God needs to remain a mystery.
This loving, wise force we call God is within everything on earth, including you and I.
Read MoreYou need a job! We all need jobs to survive. Sometimes we must work in jobs that are not our first choice. You may find satisfaction through volunteer work or hobbies.
If you are in a position where you face abuse, feel unappreciated, feel taken advantage of or are poorly paid, it may be time for you to leave.
Do not forget that you have great worth! You deserve to be treated well. Do not allow anyone or an organization to destroy your life.
Only you can know when to quit your job. Your body, your heart and your head will let you know when the time has come. Your only responsibility is to listen and act on what you know to be true.
The good news is that you have great wisdom within you. Your challenge is to learn to access your inner wisdom through connecting with your three centers of intelligence. Your three centers of intelligence are:
· Body (Sensations)
· Heart (Emotions)
· Head (Mind)
Read MoreThe Enneagram diagram reveals the powerful teachings of the Enneagram. It provides you with a path to physical, emotional, mental and spiritual health.
Exploring this powerful image shows you a path to your best self. It helps you become self-aware, and with practice, you can catch yourself before you move into unhealthy behaviour.
Read MoreGoing through a divorce is tough, even when done compassionately.
All your emotions are close to the surface, and you are angry at life. You expected to be in this relationship until death.
You are grieving what could have been. You are losing your partner with who you could share your day. It feels so lonely now.
It now feels awkward to go out with couples who you used to hang out with together. Over time you will discover who you are, your real friends.
You are responsible for everything in your household. It is easy to feel overwhelmed.
Childcare is now a lot more complicated. You suddenly find yourself as a single parent; you are exhausted. You are embarrassed to ask for help.
You are feeling angry at your spouse and probably mad at yourself. You ask yourself, why did I put up with the behaviour of this person for so long? What did I do wrong? Why didn't I see this coming months ago?
If there were an affair by one of you, feelings of betrayal would magnify your emotions even more. You will feel angry, enraged, hurt, sad and disappointed. You will have many reasons to be angry at life.
Moving through a divorce into new life takes time. The only way to move through this tumultuous time is to experience your sadness, hurt, anger and disappointments. Hiding from your pain is only going to make it worse in the long run.
Read MoreIt is almost impossible to avoid the noise of fear, rage and greed in the world. It is coming at you fast and furious through radio, tv and social media.
You probably do not have the luxury to go into the wilderness to go off-grid. Many of us can not afford to go off social media because we rely on it to promote our businesses.
When under stress, you can be blind to the sacred. The good news is that the sacred is everywhere, and you do not need to be part of any religion to experience awe.
What have you experienced as sacred? You may have experienced the holy in nature, music, art, creativity, play, religion, spirituality and more.
As you attune yourself to the sacred, you will experience it more and more in the ordinariness of life. You will have more moments of clarity recognizing something so ordinary is so extraordinary
So, what do you do?
Read MoreI offer coaching to individuals, couples and small businesses and nonprofits. I use the Deep Coaching model that helps one to become self aware and present. It helps both individuals and organizations to live in the present instead of the past and future. This type of coaching is for those who really want real change in their lives.
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