Now That Your Divorce Is Over, What Are You Looking For In A Relationship?

/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/
Now That Your Divorce Is Over, What Are You Looking For In A Relationship?

Your divorce is over, and you are wondering if you are ready to begin a new relationship. It is never wise to jump into a new relationship quickly. If you are honest with yourself, you will know when you are ready.

This in-between time is an excellent opportunity to reflect on this question: what are you looking for in a relationship? Take the time to learn from past relationships to clarify what you need and what would be nice.

Here are eight questions to ask yourself to help you name what you need in a relationship:

Read More

How To Make Your Life After Divorce Truly The Best Years Of Your Life

/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/
How To Make Your Life After Divorce Truly The Best Years Of Your Life

Moving through separation and divorce is one of the most challenging things you will do in life. But once you are through it, it is time to re-imagine your life for the next chapter.

First, you need to acknowledge your part in the relationship. How did you enhance the relationship, and how did you hinder it.

If you do not learn your lessons, you will repeat them until you take full responsibility for your behaviour.

If you feel stuck after the end of a relationship, do not be afraid to get help. Seeking help is a sign of strength and not weakness. It is now time to let go of your past relationship, accept it for what it was and focus on what you need to learn.

There are many places to get help. Divorce coaches and counsellors can help you through the immediate pain of separation, and coaches such as myself will help you re-create your life.

What dreams do you have that have gone unfulfilled unto now? Post-divorce is a time to focus on what gives you life, stop procrastinating from following your dreams and then make it happen.

Here are 9 ways to rebuild your life:

Read More

5 Ways to Thrive After a Divorce: How to get the best out of life?

/ REL Consultants (Roland Legge)/
5 Ways to Thrive After a Divorce: How to get the best out of life?

Even the best of divorces is not easy. If you do your work, you will come out of this time stronger, healthier and more confident.

Ending your relationship may feel like a chaotic time. The only way to release these intense feelings, thoughts and sensations are to move through them.

You are likely to feel sadness, anger, despair, hopelessness and confusion. One moment you will be happy, the next you will be crying.

You are not going crazy. This roller coaster of emotions is your pyche’s way to heal. You need to give yourself space to re-orient to the world without this person in your daily life.

Find safe spaces and people to allow yourself to feel the pain. Ignoring or avoiding the pain will only make it worse.

The more you try to ignore it or suppress it, the worse it is going to get.

You may feel peace for a moment, but those feelings will come back even more powerfully at inconvenient times.

You are not just grieving the loss of your relationship but what it could have been.

Most people take at least a year to move through this process, but many take longer. If you are feeling stuck, it would be wise for you to consider getting professional help.

Read More