You were in a long-term relationship, and It did not have a happy ending. You could not wait to end the relationship. Now you are out of the relationship, and you ask yourself, why am I so lonely.
Read MoreWhich Enneagram type is most common is not clear. Most of the information available to us today is based on the anecdotal experience of Enneagram practitioners. I am not aware of any scientific studies. It would be hard to do a scientific study because there are too many variables that make up the complexity of personality.
Many Enneagram practitioners have noticed, based on anecdotal experience, the six, seven and nines are most common, at least in North America.
Read MoreEven the best of divorces is not easy. If you do your work, you will come out of this time stronger, healthier and more confident.
Ending your relationship may feel like a chaotic time. The only way to release these intense feelings, thoughts and sensations are to move through them.
You are likely to feel sadness, anger, despair, hopelessness and confusion. One moment you will be happy, the next you will be crying.
You are not going crazy. This roller coaster of emotions is your pyche’s way to heal. You need to give yourself space to re-orient to the world without this person in your daily life.
Find safe spaces and people to allow yourself to feel the pain. Ignoring or avoiding the pain will only make it worse.
The more you try to ignore it or suppress it, the worse it is going to get.
You may feel peace for a moment, but those feelings will come back even more powerfully at inconvenient times.
You are not just grieving the loss of your relationship but what it could have been.
Most people take at least a year to move through this process, but many take longer. If you are feeling stuck, it would be wise for you to consider getting professional help.
Read MoreYou have an inner critic, and it is never going to go away.
You would not have survived your childhood without your inner critic. It was there to keep you safe.
Your inner critic is that negative voice within you that lets you know when you are moving into dangerous territory. The trouble is that your inner critic gets alarmed every time you try something new.
While this part of your ego kept you safe when you were young, it starts to hold you back when you become an adult.
The more you can become aware of when your inner critic is talking, the better able to you will be able to tame this part of your ego.
Five Ways to Outsmart Your Inner Critic:
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Relationships are complex. If you want a good relationship, you and your partner need to be committed to making it work.
Being committed means, you need to take responsibility for keeping your own emotional, physical and spiritual health. You need to be one hundred percent responsible for your happiness.
You need a partner who is willing to be responsible for his issues. He needs to be ready to keep himself healthy and stay committed to building a healthy and robust relationship with you.
There is nothing magical about getting married. Getting married will enhance healthy relationships and make destructive relationships even worse.
There is no such thing as getting married and happily living ever after without intention and effort.
When you both walk your talk; you are likely going to have a harmonies relationship. It takes time, patience, self-awareness and playfulness. You can make it happen.
Here are nine signs that you are in a good relationship:
Read MoreWhile the Enneagram has ancient origins, it is new for many people.
In the last couple of years, the Enneagram has moved into popular culture. You hear about it on all platforms of social media. There are more and more books written on the subject and workshops offered around the world.
With its increasing popularity there is a growing number of critics and doubters. In the context of increasing information coming out about the Enneagram, I want to counter the notion, that the Enneagram is Bogus.
Here are eight misconceptions about the Enneagram.
Read MoreAre you hungry for love? Many of us will look for a person to complete us. The reality is that no one but our self can do this. Why? Because you are one hundred percent responsible for your own happiness.
You are two whole people going into your relationship. You're there for each other to create a nurturing environment – nudging you both towards health and wholeness.
What do you desire in a relationship? You likely want intimacy, trust, safety, playfulness, encouragement, love and compassion. But are you both ready to take one hundred percent responsibility to make it happen?
Relationships should not be hard, but you will go through rough times. Are you both prepared to learn through the ups and downs of your relationship? If you both can say yes to this, you are ready to begin the adventure.
Read MoreAre you looking for balance in your body, mind and spirit? The Enneagram personality tool can help you to find greater joy in your life.
Read MoreI offer coaching to individuals, couples and small businesses and nonprofits. I use the Deep Coaching model that helps one to become self aware and present. It helps both individuals and organizations to live in the present instead of the past and future. This type of coaching is for those who really want real change in their lives.
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